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For 7 years, until I was 13 I kept it all inside..all the sexual abuse from my best friend, all the hurt and lonlieness I felt when my grandmother died, all the suicide attempts, all the anger haunting me from a good friend dying in an awful car accident, all the hate towards my uncle who was sexually abusing me as well, the feelings I started having of why my real dad left my mom, anger at him because of hurting her the way he had and yet I couldnt stop the temper tantrums I seemed to be having every day towards my mom, ...the screaming, the yelling, the hitting on my part..Oh yes. I still remember it and I dont think it will ever completely leave me. 3 years ago I finally told my mom the truth. Everything that happened to me..and how ashamed I felt. I realized why I was angry and wanting to commit suicide every minute of the day...why I was so alone and couldnt seem to keep friends...it was because I had Satan in my heart and not the Lord. The devil seemed to be in the back of my mind taunting me with "you'll never be good enough for anything. Your just trash and you know it." When I accepted God into my life and started to let go of those hateful feelings, I began to see that it wasnt my fault all that had happened to me-It wasnt my fault but I can turn it around and make it for good! To help others see that they are worth something and that I know what they are going through!! I thank God that he has given me the ability to share my testimony with others and to let them know that they are not alone...That the creator of the universe is there, always, guiding us and loving us! It says in Phillipians 4:13"I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength". Even through the hardest of things, God will give us strength to endure it. He says that he wont take away the trials, but He sure will be there with us, ALL THE WAY!..I would like to leave you now with one last verse...Isaiah 41:10 which says, "So do not fear for I am with you. Do not be dismayed for I am your God. Yes I will help you and strengthen you. And yes I will uphold you with the right hand of my righeousness." Bless God, everyone! Click HERE to return to the edited story Click HERE to create a banner that links to this story! Your e-mail address will be kept private!
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