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I want to send you my personal testimony again and I am going to mail it to people I grew up with up in Barrow,Alaska.I love your testimony site and wish to recieve testimonies weekly.I grew up in a place called Barrow,Alaska some part of my life.I lived in an alcoholic home.I was abused sexually at the age of 3-4 as far as I can remember back.I do not like to remember back that far either.I became the same way but with men I had become premiscuously attracted to men and boy's for love and affection.I lived around it so much that it became normal and I thought other people were abnormal.My Grandfather even molested me and that traumatized my life so much that I would not talk about it for many year's until I went and sought counseling and they told me never to allow anyone to make me hide what was done to me.That was very sick on their part.Not mine.Even though I had problem's also.My Grand! ! father kept me only for welfare money he was getting for me so he could have his whiskey.No one ever tried to help but would laugh and talk down at us because we were considered the town drunk's and when I was around 12 year's old or so I had been forced to have sex with men by a girl I was very scared of and she told me she would beat me if I did not do it and I was looking for love and acceptance.I felt dirtier and dirtier and hated myself so much that I wanted to commit suicide.My daughter commited suicide and I know how badly she felt because I felt worthless and people who said they cared did nothing for me.I had an abortion and the man I had the child with said that he did not care what I wanted I better have the abortion or else.He would beat me and humiliate me so much.God is merciful,he forgives me for what I have done.Maybe some of the so called christian's say they do too but I know only God loves compl! ! etely and unconditionally.People mocked me and said what a sinner I was but Jesus has stepped up and said who are these people who are sinner's too .I am now an Outreach Ministry Director with my husband at a church I love.Pastor McKenzie taught me the love of God.His wife just died after suffering many year's and I miss her and want to see her in heaven too and I want to Thank Jesus for just loving me and caring about me even though I am a total sinner.Thank you Jesus.Martha McKenzie Rousse Click HERE to return to the edited story Click HERE to create a banner that links to this story! Your e-mail address will be kept private!
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